Whats ur dream job?

During the early stages of my life,I've always wanted to be an astronaut to explore the deep spaces because when I was a child,I had so many questions of our surroundings that I've always questioned my parents with but with no satisfying answer.Like,what's really out there?Out of all the high probabilities of intelligent life,planets that equally habitable as Earth,how the FUCK can there not be aliens?Like,why do we exist at all?Why can't there just be nothing?Isn't nothing is better than this madness we call life?