I used to love this game so much, the thing is, just like in IRL jobs, it can be great and bring you joy but the people always ruin it for you eventually.
Basically I was able to play the way I wanted in casual without people being dicks, this is why I never played ranked, but after some time the "CSGO" happened, which means that everyone is now a pro and it feels like everyone's life is on the line when I'm playing, so there is absolutely no room for failing anything.