Remorse

by : Zenith - 29-02-2016, 11:09 PM
we will wait for this
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#1
OP
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:09 PM
This is less of a rant, and more of a "Should I feel sorry" situation

So I have been thinking of a situation that has happened today, and it is bothering me.

I would like serious answers please (that means you Natsu)

So there was this girl that I have liked for a very long time. Hell I even believe I fell in love with her. But after we hung out one day, she removed all communications with me for no good reason. (none that I know of). We were very good friends, and she told me many times that she was glad I was in her life, and I was her friend that she really trusts.

Now apparently that is bullshit, since she tried to replace me with another guy *who btw is a fucking creep* and completely blocked all communications. Like bitch, if our friendship was so special, why tf would you replace me this easily.

Now... I felt depressed. I didn't know what I did. I felt insecure about a situation that I had no real control over (since I don't know what I fucking did, I couldn't try to resolve it) I tried to talk to her, but she never replied.

If you guys were on the skype group / galaxy (I think) you would know that I felt used and fucking played. It's the same person.

Now today I got a message from her saying the following things/

Girl: hey

I know we haven't talked in a while

and I understand if you hate me

but right now I really need someone to talk to

And you're the one person I've always been able to trust.

I believe that is bullshit. so I turned snarky and asked what she wanted. I also laughed when she said "I was contemplating killing myself, the I remembered a time when you saved me from doing anything"

I said lol

Now my question to you is: Should I feel sorry? I feel this girl is a fake bitch, and I got used. I was also suicidal due to her beforehand (some people here may know about it). So I don't feel any sense of remorse.

But I would like to hear your thoughts. Am I just being an asshole? Or am I right?
we will wait for this


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#2
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:14 PM
I won't say whether you should show her sympathy or not - as that isn't our call to make. Purely yours.
Rather than dwelling on the past though, why not see why she did what she did? She may have had a legitimate reason. As for the you feeling suicidal because of her, if you still feel that it is possible you will relapse into your past - cut off communication with her immediately.

So, in short. Do what you think you should do - from a level headed perspective. Kind of shut off your emotions for a while and think about things logically.
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#3
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Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:17 PM
I did ask her for her motives. She hasn't read it yet. She said goodbye before that
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#4
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:18 PM (This post was last modified: 29-02-2016, 11:18 PM by Konnoyu.)
First, and most importantly, it takes a ton of courage to openly say some of the things you have. Secondly, I'm sorry she put you through this.

As tough as it's been on you, I do imagine it hasn't been easy on her either. If she's coming back to you, then she it seems that she knows she's made a mistake. Have you tried speaking with her directly about it, or maybe asking for an apology, or letting her know how you felt about her and how what she did made you feel? It might also be a possibility that she was scared, or that she didn't understand just how much she meant to you. You didn't deserve to have that happen to you; nobody does, but that doesn't mean you should hold it against her. If she's coming back to you, it means that she trusts you, and it isn't right of you to take advantage of that. In my honest opinion though, no, you shouldn't feel bad. You were hurt, and you acted as anybody who was hurt would. I understand that you don't feel any sense of remorse, but brushing her off still isn't the best move. If you want advice, I say you talk with her about what happened, and how it made you feel. It's not going to be an easy talk, I know, but it's going to help.
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#5
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:19 PM
(29-02-2016, 11:17 PM)Zenith Wrote: I did ask her for her motives. She hasn't read it yet. She said goodbye before that

How long ago was that.
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#6
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Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:20 PM (This post was last modified: 29-02-2016, 11:21 PM by : Zenith.)
(29-02-2016, 11:18 PM)Konnoyu Wrote: Have you tried speaking with her directly about it, or maybe asking for an apology, or letting her know how you felt about her and how what she did made you feel?  but that doesn't mean you should hold it against her.

1. I have done both before hand. Back when I was really depressed. She refused to answer me.

2. I feel used. She is only coming to me because it is a tough time and she is probably expecting me to say the shit I have been saying for over a year now.

(29-02-2016, 11:19 PM)Silence Wrote:
(29-02-2016, 11:17 PM)Zenith Wrote: I did ask her for her motives. She hasn't read it yet. She said goodbye before that

How long ago was that.

30 minutes?
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#7
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:22 PM
I wouldn't give someone like that a second chance, always blows up in your face.

Anyway, to the real question if you should feel sorry, probably not.
What would someone expect from doing something like that? Ask yourself and you'll see.

Though I'm weird so I wouldn't know about this.
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#8
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:22 PM (This post was last modified: 29-02-2016, 11:22 PM by Konnoyu.)
(29-02-2016, 11:20 PM)Zenith Wrote:
(29-02-2016, 11:18 PM)Konnoyu Wrote: Have you tried speaking with her directly about it, or maybe asking for an apology, or letting her know how you felt about her and how what she did made you feel?  but that doesn't mean you should hold it against her.

1. I have done both before hand. Back when I was really depressed. She refused to answer me.

2. I feel used. She is only coming to me because it is a tough time and she is probably expecting me to say the shit I have been saying for over a year now.

Then it sounds like you've already made up your mind, Zenith. If she really has hurt you that much, then she's not worth it. 
Silence
29-02-2016, 11:23 PM
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#9
Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:24 PM
(29-02-2016, 11:20 PM)Zenith Wrote:
(29-02-2016, 11:18 PM)Konnoyu Wrote: Have you tried speaking with her directly about it, or maybe asking for an apology, or letting her know how you felt about her and how what she did made you feel?  but that doesn't mean you should hold it against her.

1. I have done both before hand. Back when I was really depressed. She refused to answer me.

2. I feel used. She is only coming to me because it is a tough time and she is probably expecting me to say the shit I have been saying for over a year now.

(29-02-2016, 11:19 PM)Silence Wrote:
(29-02-2016, 11:17 PM)Zenith Wrote: I did ask her for her motives. She hasn't read it yet. She said goodbye before that

How long ago was that.

30 minutes?

Well, regardless or not whether you should feel sorry for her. If she's feeling suicidal, you should at least attempt to do what you can. You'd have at least wanted someone to do that for you when you were blue, wouldn't you? Give it about 10 more minutes, if she doesn't even view the message then start calling her/messaging her on other forms of contact.

Now, I may just be saying this since me and my girlfriend - as well as a good friend all nearly put a bullet through our skulls last night.
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#10
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Posted: 29-02-2016, 11:27 PM (This post was last modified: 29-02-2016, 11:28 PM by : Zenith.)
(29-02-2016, 11:24 PM)Silence Wrote:

Well, regardless or not whether you should feel sorry for her. If she's feeling suicidal, you should at least attempt to do what you can. You'd have at least wanted someone to do that for you when you were blue, wouldn't you? Give it about 10 more minutes, if she doesn't even view the message then start calling her/messaging her on other forms of contact.

Now, I may just be saying this since me and my girlfriend - as well as a good friend all nearly put a bullet through our skulls last night.

The problem I am having is that although I wanted someone to do that, I didn't get any of the help that I needed. So what makes her think that she deserves the same from me

"I am not a fan of forgiveness"

and shit don't do that. no pls no don't
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