I never played League but....

I see a lot of art of the characters and cosplayers and stuff. I can't get into the game itself because I just don't enjoy mobas, but you know what? It'd rock if it was a dating sim or a dating sim disguised as an action game like Mass Effect. Everyone is so hot in the game. I want to romance Arcade Hecarim. I feel that he'd take me to a cool 80s-themed nighclub or arcade, and then let me ride on his back in the moonlight. I think he'd be a gentle and considerate lover despite his huge, metallic horse body.